Friday, October 9, 2009

a year ago

Last October was full of stress and sadness. A much different kind than this October. The stress came from trying to get a house ready for sale. Trying to get everything packed up for the move. Trying to finish up at work. The sadness was from saying goodbye to friends, family and coworkers, neighbors I enjoyed and a house I had fallen in love with. But that October also contained excitement. I was looking forward to the move. I had been to Utah several times. The land here is amazing, no other way to put it. I looked forward to all the adventure coming our way. And did it come! We have enjoyed the heck out of the mountains here. Hiking, biking, snowshoeing, skiing and snowboarding. And just gazing. We have explored the southern red rocks of Utah to no end. Backpacked amongst cliff dwellings. We have even been on a dinosaur dig and seen real dinosaur bones. We have seen moose and bald eagles. And best of all, we have had several friends and some family join us on this great ride.

Wednesday night I said I didn't feel relief yet from my decision. Yesterday I did feel something. I can't say it was relief. More like release. I found myself not thinking about this for a couple of moments. I also felt myself looking ahead again. Looking ahead to the next adventure. Finding normal again. I have always tried to stuff as much fun in my life as possible. These last couple of months I pushed the pause button. I am going to try and stuff my grief in my back pocket and push the play button. I am starting to feel ok.

I have attached some pics. The colorful ones are from our hike at Stewart Falls a couple of weeks ago. The snowy ones are the view from our balcony this past week. And the delightful child is our friends child born the day before I left ny. I included her cuz you just can't help smiling:)

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